I think I’m going crazy. Is it possible to go crazy when you’re only 16? I can’t go anywhere without hearing those voices in my head, telling me what to do, where to go, whom to hate. I’m falling apart slowly. So slowly that it’s making me even crazier than I already am. I take one step and it feels like a whole minute has gone past. I take two steps and I feel like I’m going to topple over. I take three steps and I’m on the ground.
Someone comes over and says something. I just want to laugh. Or cry. I can’t understand why there are people all around me. Their heads look so big staring down at my body on the ground. At least I think I’m on the ground, no, not anymore. How much time has past? Now I’m being taken away into a large white vehicle. I can’t see anymore, it’s too dark to see anything. I can’t breath anymore. I hear a voice. It’s the man next to me. He’s asking me what did I take.
What did I take? Was it the pills next to her bed? Was it from the containers hidden in my drawers? I can’t remember anymore. Yes I can. I remember Steve. I remember him leaving and me crying. I couldn’t believe it when they said he’d gone and left me. Left me alone, like I was before. I had no one to turn to for help, no one to listen to me. I don’t need them now though. I’m leaving too and they can’t stop me.
“There’s too much blood.” The man beside me says. “She’s not going to make it.” I told you they couldn’t stop me. I made sure of that. I had done what everyone thought I didn’t have the guts to do. I ended it all, my life, my pain, and my hate. All because of Steve leaving me. Just one or two slashes of the blade and I had ended it all. Just one or two bottles of pills and I had ended it all. All because of Steve leaving me. Who ever said love hurts, lied. I don’t feel a thing now, nothing at all. I remember the last words I heard from him, before he left. He told me not to give up. “Look at me now!” I want to scream. What kind of father would leave his daughter alone again? I probably meant nothing to him. Even though he meant so much to me. It doesn’t matter now though, because now I’m gone as well. Like father like daughter.
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