Gave Up: Broken
The lyrics:
perfect little dream
the kind that hurts the most
forgot how it feels, well almost
no one to blame
always the same
open my eyes, wake up in flames
it took you to make me realize [3x]
it took you to make me see the light
smashed up my sanity
smashed up integrity
smashed up what I believe in
smashed up what's left of me
smashed up my everything
smashed up all that was true
gonna smash myself to pieces
I don't know what else to do
covered in hope and vaseline
still cannot fix this broken machine
watching the hole, it used to be mine
just watching it burn in my steady systematic decline
of the trust I will betray
give it to me, I throw it away
after everything I've done, I hate myself for what I've become
I tried
I gave up
throw it away
(Pre 5-12-98)
I personally think that the whole song was created during a mutually abusive mindset. The best time I can listen to this song is when I'm getting depressed and I start really thinking about some previous intimate relationships I've had. The relationships where both parties were mutually destructive to each other, and one person is feeling torn and destroyed by what has taken place, and feels guilt for what s/he's inflicted. In the end, the person being spoken about (probably himself) gave up on the whole situation of someone else to care about -- and not just the significant other that tore him down so.
Okay, atleast that's how I feel when I listen to the song. But I listen to it because that's my interpretation of the song right now.